Wrestling with Jacob

A journal of faith, grief and devotional musings

grief

  • An unexpected and inexpressible gift

    I received the most amazing gift from my wife this Christmas. I was caught a bit off guard when I received it because we decided not to exchange gifts with each other. The gift came unwrapped, without a bow but was to me the most beautiful and thoughtful thing I have ever received. I say it was thoughtful,… Read more

  • A Christmas confession

    I am struggling with holiday depression. I feel its heavy pull today so I write with the reins in hand pulling back hard to keep me from writing too deep into the darkness I feel. All is well and good in my life and yet my soul is cast down- and so it goes, no reason to be sullen but… Read more

  • Cherishing the chair

    In 1987 Mr. Lynch was my future wife’s high school chemistry teacher. He once said to me “Someday, she is going to make somebody a good wife.” Mr. Lynch was right but I would add after 28 years of marriage that she has been much more than a good wife. She is an excellent wife,… Read more

  • The life and death of passion

    Four family deaths and the burial of three loved ones on the same day did something to me that only those closest to me have witnessed. Today I want to reveal it to everybody. The death of Jacob has doused many passions I once enjoyed and involved myself in life. Like a bucket of water thrown on a campfire… Read more

  • Grief withdrawals

    It is 3:45 AM and I can’t sleep again. At least this time I wasn’t awakened by night terrors. Stress seems to trigger certain things in grief like restlessness and nightmares. There is a veiled part of grief that I carry that most do not see or recognize. I am struggling with it greatly at… Read more